Whatever...!: laughs

Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Pancake breakfast

http://www.wnd.comPancake breakfast

Pours it on.

Editor’s note: Do you need something to smile about? Every day, WND selects the best joke offered up by readers and contributors to its Laughlines forum and brings it to you as the WND Joke of the Day. Here is today’s offering:

A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons, Kevin, 5,
Ryan 3.

The boys began to argue over who would get the
first pancake.

Their mother saw the opportunity for a moral
lesson.

“If Jesus were sitting here, He would say, ‘Let my
brother have the first pancake, I can wait.’”

Kevin turned to his younger brother and said,
“Ryan, you be Jesus!”

Got a great joke you want to share with the world? Write it up in the WND
Laughlines forum. Who knows? It might be selected as the WND Joke of
the Day – and your wildest dreams will come true.

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http://www.wnd.com/2012/06/pancake-breakfast/http://www.wnd.com

Monday, June 4, 2012

My son is moving out...

Two men were having coffee, when one of them said: Last night, my son just walked into the living room and said, "Dad, cancel my allowance immediately, rent my room out, throw all my clothes out of the window, take my TV, stereo, iPhone, iPod, and my laptop. Please give my jewelry to the Salvation Army or Goodwill. Then sell my car. Take my front door key away from me and throw me out of the house. Then disown me and never talk to me again. And don't forget to write me out of your will and leave my share to my brother."

The other man said: "Wow, he really said that?"

"Well, he didn't put it quite that way. He actually said...'Dad, I've decided to work for Obama's re-election campaign.'

Bewildered Cowboy

While hiking down along the border this morning, I saw a Muslim extremist fall into the Rio Grande River. He was struggling to stay afloat because of all the guns and bombs he was carrying.

Along with him was a Mexican who was also struggling to stay afloat because of the large backpack of drugs that was strapped to his back. If they didn't get help, they'd surely drown.

Being a responsible Texan and abiding by the law to help those in distress, I informed the El Paso County Sheriff 's Office and Homeland Security.

It is now 4 PM, both have drowned, and neither authority has responded. I'm starting to think I wasted two stamps.